Just A Thought
by circularwaffles
Summary: Lana reflects on the various ways friendships have grown apart from one another and others come closer together. A dark reflection from the POV of one Lana Lang, no sex, drugs or rock 'n roll sorry folks but spoilers from 'Tomb' and Fragile'.


**_A/N:_** Lana reflects on the past. If you don't like spoilers, a brief mention of 'Fragile' and 'Tomb' this is a one-shot story. I do_ not_ own Smallville, really, if I did, well, I'd probably be writing a form of fiction that also has pay, but that's besides the point… This is my first time writing from This is my first time writing from Lana's point of view ever, so bring on the honest reviews! I'm a big girl, I can take it! One Shot, Warning: Dark Lana

**_Just a Thought_**

Lana flopped on her bed while she reflected on everything that had happened to her recently, and then some. She and Chloe had just got back from jogging around the university campus. Neither Lana nor Chloe needed exercise for dieting reasons, but if Lana didn't do something other then sit around the dorm room systematically working through her astronomy paper, she would scream.

"Do you want me to grab milk from Erik's mini-fridge for the tea?" Chloe asked, still flushed and mildly out of breath from the jog. She was setting up a small, fold up table on the floor so they could grab pillows and enjoy talking to one another without the disruption of the common room. Lana had recently received some Swiss chocolate Lex had brought back with him on his latest adventure.

"No, just some honey or sugar if we have it." Lana studied Chloe as she busied herself with setting up there small dining area. The dark feeling in the bottom of her stomach twisted. Ever since Graduation, Chloe and Clark had shared something Lana would never be able to feel herself. At first she thought it was intimacy, but after she and Clark made love for the first time, she knew that wasn't it. Clark had shared his secret. Lana knew it.

"Lana, are you okay?" Chloe brushed some of her still mildly sweaty hair out of her face and into a casual but efficient pony tail.

"I'm fine," Lana smiled promptly. She knew that her recent, twisted behavior to try and communicate with her parents still unnerved Chloe. It was probably one of the only reasons Chloe had agreed to come running with Lana, to try and prove that she was still okay with Lana.

In some secret part of her, tucked into a dark corner of her heart, she knew that it had simply taken Chloe one more step away from Lana. One step away from her, Chloe's only other female friend besides Lois and another step closer to Clark.

Chloe had shrugged off Lana's contemplative state and simply chucked her sweatshirt into a steadily growing pile of dirty laundry she would take home with her when she visited her father. "If you give me a minute, I'll be ready for our snack as soon as I get off these disgusting clothes." She cast a quick smile at Lana before grabbing a towel and heading off to the shower to just rinse off the sweat.

"Um, you go ahead, I think I'll just skip the shower on this one and wait for you here." Lana's face froze in a smile.

"Sure," Chloe shrugged it off as nothing. "It's your hygiene." She walked out of the doorway.

As soon as Chloe had turned into the shared bathroom Lana's smile dissolved away. Ever since Chloe had cut herself, Lana couldn't stand to be in the same room as her, never mind share a bathroom at the same time. Both Clark and Chloe claimed possession but Lana couldn't help herself. Maybe Chloe would be better off in a mental institution or the very least see a psychiatrist. If the mental illness that her mother had was hereditary, how safe would Chloe be? Or what scared Lana the most was, how truly safe would she be from her own roommate?

Lana's cell phone vibrated and she checked her text messages. It was Lex confirming there plans for dinner later that night. She got to spend yet another night with the billionaire, plus to have delectable sushi and one less cafeteria meal to worry about. A future friendship with Lex was beginning to look brighter every day.

'And it doesn't hurt that it drives both Chloe and Clark crazy,' her inner voice slithered unbidden into her thoughts. Lana expected Clark to pull the overzealous ex-boyfriend routine but Chloe… Sometimes Lana wondered if at the time of Lionel Luthor's trial there was more going on between the reporter and the Luthor heir then anyone knew. It would explain the bewildered, maybe even hurt expression Chloe's face displayed the night she walked in on Lana and Lex innocently chatting.

Lana pushed herself out of bed and started pulling out a fresh pair of pants and a clean tee-shirt. Lana knew that the unbidden feeling at the bottom of her stomach was envy. She had an irrational surge of jealously; knew Chloe would be going back to a loving father, Gabe who at one time even welcomed Lana under his roof. To Clark, who in one way or another a piece of Lana would always belong to him. Each of them, Lana at one time or another cared for and all of them praised the wonderful and brilliant Sullivan woman. Subconsciously Lana knew that Chloe didn't have it as easy, but it didn't make the feeling go away.

Although Chloe was lucky in friends and family, Lana had never been in short supply of admirers. The dark part of Lana agreed, Chloe would never be as lucky in her romantic life as Lana. In the shadow of her feelings was something Lana would never even admit to herself. If she could have her family back, have Clark all to herself, only if she sacrificed her beauty, whatever charisma it was that drew all sorts of people to her… She would not do it.

Chloe walked back into the room with fresh clothes on, humming tunelessly while combing her fingers through her damn hair. "Water is ready, I'll pour you choose which crappy paper cups you wanna drink out of."

"Go for the Snoopy cups." Lana's fake radiant smile returned in full force. "I swear I'm getting off of my bed this time."

Chloe just shrugged it off and started to set up their tea table.

Lana pulled her fresh clothes on, sighing as the soft, dry fabric, cool to the skin, held to her body in a silent hug. All she needed in this world was herself, she knew of no other freshman who had a billionaire eating out of the palm of her hand. In time she would learn Clark's secret, with or without his consent.

"Tea is gonna get cold if you take any longer Lana." Chloe teased, started to lower herself and handed the first bar of chocolate over to Lana. "Do you want to do the honors?"

"Yes Chloe," Lana smiled, as did the darkness within her as she reached out to take the sweet object of craving out of Chloe's hands. "I believe I will."


End file.
